Smooth Criminal

My daughter was convinced that Michael Jackson’s song, Smooth Criminal, had the lyrics, “baby, are you walking, are you walking, baby?”. I know you’re figuring out the tune and will have it stuck in your head all day. You’re welcome. Taylor’s new album isn’t out just yet so this ear worm will hold you over until then. 

An innocent mistake. I get it. I used to sit next to my boom box playing tape cassettes and trying desperately to figure out words with just the right press of the rewind and forward buttons. Don’t get me started on what happened when the player “ate” the cassette tape and the ribbon laid helpless on the ground with all the words hidden forever. I can still picture those sad cassettes in the garbage. 

In my daughter’s defense, I actually thought the lyrics said, “Eddie, are you ok” but it’s not about baby or Eddie, it’s Annie. Turns out we were both wrong. 

“Annie are you ok, are you ok, Annie?”

This reminds me of the smooth criminals that are best known as diet culture. They say whatever’s convenient to sell their product and don’t really care about your actual health. They throw out their gimmick lines and let you interpret what their promise could mean for you. There no long term study showing that more than a teeny tiny fraction of people succeed with diets and weight loss, yet they keep you coming back for more with a new empty promise. 

Here’s a small example of deceipt in action. 

I sat at my regular doctor’s check up this week and the wall poster was promoting weight loss surgery. They gave the statistic that ONE IN ONE HUNDRED people are successful with diet and exercise in terms of weight loss. So just get under the knife instead where death is only a possible side effect!! Too many Americans are too big and need to lose weight! 

Guses what? Americans of a wide variety of sizes are actually doing ok. 

We know diets and exercise don’t work but we’re still going to hold hands with our weight loss brothers to promote our body amputation surgery that might lead to death, but that’s ok since we’re getting paid! 

Diet culture is one of the smoothest criminals out there. Taking over $70 billion dollars, and counting, from consumers every year with literally no leg to stand on to support its claims. 

Don’t be hit by another one of diet culture’s smooth criminals. Keep walking, baby.