Social Media Spring Cleaning

It's been a long time since I've engaged personally on social media.  I made the conscious choice to stop scrolling online and start focusing my time IRL.  As a busy mom of 6, my time is precious and getting sucked into the social media vortex wasn't where I wanted to spend my minutes, hours, days and years over time.  Even just 10 minutes a day adds up to 25 days over 10 years.  

I admit, however, that social distancing has me wanting to reach for my phone and scroll as a distraction, to see "what's going on" or to feel connected.  So far, I haven't been pulled back, other than reading a few specific posts (you know the ones that pop into your inbox....so and so has a new post!). I know that if I do scroll, however, my feed will be "safe".  

A while ago, I made sure that all of the people I follow in my feed were body positive.  Research shows that looking at images of people who are smaller than you or model size zero, will negatively affect your body image.  Following people your size or bigger is really healing for both body and mind.  It makes sense.  If you're constantly following somebody smaller than you, your brain will inevitably think you're a failure because you're not that size.  It's very normal to compare and despair.  

Your brain’s knee-jerk reaction is to compare yourself to others.  We’ve been conditioned to compare ourselves from very young into adulthood. It’s probably impossible to rid your mind completely of these thoughts, but if you choose to check your feed, your ability to stay sane and happy will be improved by following these tips:

1. Remind yourself that everyone suffers.  There’s not one person in the world who has a perfect life.  Even if their IG account is filled with moments of perfection, the reality is that there are other moments, days, months or even years that are filled with imperfection.  

2. Un-follow.   You can un-follow friends, celebrities, brands, fitness experts (#fitspo), nutritionists or any other unrealistic images or people IRL or online. The media makes money off making you feel “less than” so turning away from this marketing online or in person will absolutely make you feel better.  Turn towards friends and family who love you unconditionally. 

3. Get curious.  When your brain starts making comparisons, get curious about what you’re really thinking.  Do you wish you had more time, more money, more confidence? How can you make those things happen? Sometimes a little bit of jealousy can illuminate your true desires and spark your next project or adventure.  

4. Choose radical acceptance.  There is no way to permanently change your body without doing mental and or physical harm.  Studies show that weight loss is the biggest predictor of weight gain and that ⅔  of people who go on a diet will regain more weight than they originally lost. Choosing radical acceptance of your body right now is the only way to have peace and freedom around food and your body.  Treat yourself with kindness and respect.  

5. Believe That You’re Good Enough. You’re 100% lovable and worthy simply because you’re here on this planet.  If you’re finding this hard to believe, you can come up with a narrative that you repeat to yourself like: “good for them, but that’s not me and I’m perfect just the way I am” or “I’m the best version of myself” or “I don’t have be the best, I’m me and I’m great” or “I’m average and I’m amazing and that’s ok”.

This extra time at home might be the perfect time to stop doing selfies, put your phone down and practice some social media distancing, too.