In light of the news this week, I'm keeping things brief. Sometimes distraction is good and necessary, sometimes distraction takes us too far away from reality.

What do you do from so far away to help those suffering the unthinkable? Maybe a simple truce with your own body is a good place to start. Food (and your body) doesn't need to be the enemy or weapon. 

The diet industry is really good at making your mind be the "bad guy". They want you to believe that getting control over your food and body is a mind game. If you could just master the ability to control your "overdesire" and "overhunger" for food, you'd stop overthinking your food. Sound familiar? 

Guess what? Desiring food is normal and so is your hunger. You can't think your way out of or over your body's natural desire to be at a certain set point. Your body will win EVERY. TIME. You can meditate until you're a shiny golden Buddha statue, but you still wont be able to "overcome" natural and normal hunger and...

Eighteen 6th graders filled our yard last week for a back-to-school hang out. It's definitely not called a "playdate" at this point because that would, low-key, not be cool. The kids would all dip if they found out it was still called a "playdate". 

It was the classic pre-teen awkward social interaction with boys on one side of the line and girls on the other side of the imaginary line. They came together for the pinnacle of the event. 

The Kona Ice Truck. 

I don't know what genius thought up this dream machine, but every year it makes our summer at 4th of July, long swim meets and pool parties. There's nothing like getting that cup of shaved ice in the shape of an ice cream cone and playing flavor maker with the bottomless syrup dispensers. Ice, ice, baby. 

The kids mingled and shared their concoctions and then it was promptly back to boys v girls. All we needed was a disco ball, streamers and an awkward eight minute slow dance song from Journey and I would've...

After years of palate expanders, retainers and braces, my daughter will finally be getting her braces off next week. 

Just as I was about to hit "add to cart" on some confetti, streamers and balloons, our orthodontic technician delivered the grim news in his monochromatic tone. 

"Well, after you get your braces off, you'll wear a retainer 24/7 for four months and then shift to wearing your retainer at night only for the rest of your life".

"I'm sorry, did you just say.....FOR THE REST OF HER LIFE, like when she's seventy years old??"

Owen looked at me straight in the face and said, "yes, ma'am". 

My daughter mouthed from her reclined dentist chair position, "nobody wears them, mom", but I was still mortified. 

All these year of enduring pain and suffering and annoyance and it will never end? What kind of a deal is this?

You know my mind went straight to comparing this to a diet. 

The diet companies promise you they'll make your body smaller in no...

My friend came to me in a panic, unsure of how to respond to her eight year old daughter. 

The night before, her daughter had looked in the mirror and asked her mom if she was fat. It's hard to not feel like this is a loaded statement as every woman in America has been brainwashed into diet culture's code of ethics that states every good woman should do her part to stay, maintain or at the very least throw spaghetti at the wall until she finds a weight loss gimmick that sticks. 

My friend, stunned by her daughter's comment replied like you probably would have....

"No, no, no honey, you're not fat. You're beautiful and strong and just look at all the things you can do!" 

I would've said the same thing until I knew better. 

Assuring this sweet girl that she's not fat actually just reinforced the idea that fat is bad and thin is good. My book takes a deeper dive into how to respond to these comments, especially if the comment is coming from a...

Everyone has a "naughty" friend their childhood. The one that pushes the teacher's buttons, the one who gets in trouble at school yet acts like an angel at home, the one who lies and gets away with it (most of the time), and the one who smokes and drinks well before its appropriate or legal.

That friend of mine was Erin. 

We played the Ouija board, toilet papered houses (I swear it was for school) and loved a good, innocent prank. 

One day after school in my basement, we decided it would be a good idea to prank call the operator (remember you could just hit zero?) and sing her the song, Smooth Operator by Sade. Mind you, * 69 may have entered the scene, but caller ID wasn't a thing yet. This operator was no dummy. As soon as we got through enough Sade to have us doubled over in stitches, we hung up the phone. 

Not a minute later, the phone rang. And whaddya know? 

It was our operator friend telling us she was so smooth that she knew the number we were...

I don’t make time to do my hair. I should, but I don’t. I realized long ago that something's gotta give when trying to get six kids ready for school and my hair lost. 

I have all the things like a nice hair dryer and curling iron, but they just collect dust while I attempt a rather pathetic two minute post shower detangle spray and hair towel routine. To say I look forward to my haircuts is an understatement. Upon entry, the smell of fruity hibiscus hits my nose, I’m brought a cup of hot tea and then whisked off for a scalp massage. What makes every haircut special, though, is the conversations I have with my stylist. Over the years, I've had two, in particular, who consistently make my day. I’ll refer to them as daymakers. You know those people who leave you with a happy, perma-smile, kind of feeling. They're doing more than cutting hair and are rare gems worth treasuring. 

At my last haircut, my daymaker stylist and I, as usual, talked about the...

Is it me or are celebrities going further off the deep end of reality?

If you haven’t already heard about, read or listened to Gwenyth Paltrow’s (aka GP) latest interview with Dr. Will Cole, you’re in for a doozy, because GP is officially out to lunch (well, not literally because she apparently doesn’t eat lunch or breakfast but I’ll get to that in a second). I refuse to post the link to her interview because it’s full of dangerous ideas.

The interview with Dr. Cole, a chiropractic doctor, opens with her being embarrassed that her IV drip was still connected. I’m sorry, but I thought IV’s were reserved for those who were sick and actually needed real medical care? Apparently, Gwenyth likes to mainline her vitamins because multivitamins are just so 1980’s. I can already smell the smoke from the flames that will go up about this interview, but I keep listening to the dumpster fire. 

Gwenyth moves on from the IV’s...

Surrounded by light up plastic snowflakes with the smell of popcorn lingering in the air, my kids and I sat in anticipation of the Disney on Ice (Frozen & Encanto) debut. Kids clad in Elsa, Anna and Mirabel costumes waved excitedly as Olaf took the ice. The Frozen story was underway when Elsa and Anna popped up on a side platform as they got ready for Elsa's coronation.  

“Anna, you look beautiful” Elsa proclaimed. 

A giddy Anna said, “You look beautifuller….I mean you don’t look FULLER…..you just look very beautiful”. 

An awkward moment of silence just long enough for kids to understand that looking FULLER is not a good thing cut right through the popcorn haze. 

Damn you, Disney on Ice. I’m disappointed to say the least, especially amidst the absolutely awful new AAP (American Academy of Pediatrics) guidelines that recommend medication, weight loss through dieting and...

I forgot how much I enjoy shushing down tree lined hills with fresh snow flakes sprinkling the air. A little bit of chatting on the chair lift, finding your own path down the mountain, gorgeous views and hours outside in nature. 

I also forgot how much I don’t enjoy skiing in pouring rain, chopping through sloshy snow and dodging sheets of ice along with out of control skiers. My wet noodle of a three year old also lacked in the desirability category despite her best efforts. 

I’ve seen bumper stickers in our area that read, “Ski The East”. The subtitle, IMHO, should be, “we brave every element”. It’s the equivalent to those 26.3 bumpers stickers. You ran a marathon? I did .1 more. You skied in Colorado? I skied in rain, sleet and snow. 

The biggest issue for me was the huge sheets of ice. Once you hit one, you’re better off riding it out than trying to turn or you’ll inevitability yard sale and pray that someone...

My sons and I stared at the scoreboard incredulously while my newly minted three year old pumped her fists in the air. The rest of us didn’t feel like dancing in the dark to the pop tunes blaring from the speakers anymore. None of us were feeling the neon strobe lights either.

Somehow this little girl had just smoked us all in bowling. And not just regular bowling, but Candlepin bumper bowling. There were no awkward, heavy balls or open gutters that we could point at for our loss. She even chose a practical twirling dress for the occasion and didn't even wear the official bowling shoes. 

It was here carefree attitude about the whole thing that was most annoying. 

The rest of us sweated it out and gave our best effort at the line every time. Swinging our arms straight forward and back, aiming for our ten pins, looking where we wanted the ball to go, doing the classic "move over" bowling arms to magically guide our ball, strategizing and...